In my e-mail today:
"So much happens on Twitter every day, whether it's breaking news, a deal at your favorite shop, a local traffic jam or a funny pick-me-up from a friend. Twitter keeps you informed with what matters most to you today and helps you discover what might matter to you most tomorrow.
Aren't you curious to know what you're missing on Twitter right now?"
*sighs* No, not really. Let me deal with the noise in my head first before adding any more chatter.