Saturday, February 26, 2011

It's during the night that I think about dying. I've written about this before, that I sometimes think about God and/or the supernatural when I wake up during the middle of the night, involuntarily. I wonder what the mystery of death is, why we are alive at all, what these years on earth and this experience means.

Maybe I wake up thinking about this because I don't think about it much during the day, when I'm tasked with so many things, or would rather watch reality TV than contemplate more profound matters. Even if I do think about these things during the day, it is so much more immediate during the night, like death is right there waiting, it's just time that separates us.

I think about losing people and what that would mean. It's such a difficult thing to think about. My parents, what would I do if they weren't around?

I hope I won't have to contemplate my own death in an imminent way for a very long time, but there are cancers and heart attacks, car accidents, etc. What will I go to my death bed regretting?

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